We found out in February that the Lord has blessed our family with a baby! We’re continuing to pray that this baby will be a sticky one. So far, so good. I had an ultrasound last week and we saw a baby with a strong heartbeat. Nausea and exhaustion have been my friends for the past several weeks which we are taking as good signs.
I debated on whether to post at all. We have gone through two miscarriages in the past two years and lost three babies. Knowing we had a missed miscarriage in 2015 (where we saw the heartbeat and then the baby later passed) in the midst of all of Emmie’s stuff, we chose to keep silent with the babies in November and December until it was “safe.” It was so very hard mourning in silence. Especially when it was our two babies. I still haven’t been able to put into words a memorial like I did with our baby Isaac.
Recently, I’ve read several articles about how we hide miscarriages. Try not to share pregnancy too early for fear the baby won’t ever be held…I’m not sure why we hide. Why do we need to mourn in silence? In the past two years, we’ve have three babies who are gone forever. But, before they were gone, they were here. They were a blessing and they were our gifts.
Just like our babies we said good-bye to too soon, this baby, is a blessing. All babies are. Something I shared when we found out we were pregnant with Emmie after our hardest miscarriage was this exact fact.
We’re cautiously optimistic with this baby. Anything can happen. Experience has taught us that. But today, we choose to celebrate in our blessing. In all of the exhaustion and nausea. This baby is a blessing. This baby is loved. This baby is wanted. Oh is this baby wanted.